This juxtaposition is so interesting. And now we have “a weakened system that bends constantly towards one person’s dysfunction…” How far can it bend until it snaps?
I do not remember ever reading this poem, though I knew about the artist -- overshadowed by his peers. Former English and art teacher, here, and I thoroughly enjoyed your discussion of the poem. What a perfect way to start my week! Your father seems more real and human to me than your uncle, his wife or any of his children.
Wisdom and insight most gracefully expressed. The lesson is clear. It’s a tragic mess of human disabilities. Mistakes are the best teachers of how to do it better next time. Better mistakes ? Yes! Because we must learn and repair and improve without end. Just a a most elegant essay! Wow. Let’s continue to follow the path of being. NOT best….just constantly seeking to be better for more of us more of the time.
And why do so many Americans say that it's someone else who needs to change, while all the world knows that the only person you can change is yourself?
You're creating an impasse by default. You need some training in logic to avoid that.
Interesting way to look at it. I know and have experienced much history myself. Anyone can see how it repeats itself. We can also learn much about similarities in people. Aside from all we can learn it is fun and ever fascinating.
Fine essay. I read Browning’s poem in a course of Victorian poetry with a great teacher. I was 20 years old, now 92. Never forgot its message, of which you reminded me today. We have forgotten who we were and lean on an image that must be constantly enlivened to be true. Now we are losing what others died for: our freedom.
Thank you. As others have said I learn new things (and this time in a different way-I enjoyed your approach today) when I read your newsletters. I read somewhere lately ""Never stop learning because history never stops teaching!"
The common myth of America's "exceptionalism" has blinded us to the creeping erosion of our country, no more coasting along without engaging as citizens. The mass murderer is now cocooned in our White House.
No, it has been espoused as Ameria’s idenity for many years Take a look back for the details. By April, 2025 many people began asking how America went down a path leading to where we are now at and “America Exceptionalism” was included with apathy. Visit my substack “Swaying trees…” and read my posts about these two mind sets. On top of these are political decisions that shifted Americans away from “The American Dream” it’s not a pretty picture, but knowledge is empowering. I follow both Heather Cox Richardson and Timothy Synder then research for more details. Knowledge is empowering, join in!
This is what I was referring to: "The term "American exceptionalism" was rarely used after the 1930s until U.S. newspapers popularized it in the 1980s to describe America's cultural and political uniqueness."
I remember looking into the mirror after supper, when the daylight had nearly vanished.
The basin was cold, the towel damp, and the light - by kerosene lamp, candle, sometimes gaslight - cast shadows that reminded me of a specter.
My hair was dark, my skin pale, but my eyes… Not blue. Not gray. But, Pumice. Stone-ish and porous, Ever so different. Etched with flecks. Was this what I was destined to become?
I saw it. Others saw it. And I knew it made people uneasy. But I didn’t mind. I wasn’t trying to be beautiful. I was trying to be kind.
I loved today’s article. Thank you. I have surmised that your uncle may be the way he is because he was surrounded by people that have told him how great, wonderful, smart, handsome, and every other positive adjective one can think of…all of his life.
You can see it in a toddler as you try to help build their self esteem. Imagine continuing to hear that your entire life. Of course you’d believe it as your uncle does. It’s the building of a monster.
From what I read the mother of Trump could not cope with her last two children. She had a difficult husband and became mired in neurosis and illness.
Apparently young Donald had very little attention and became a severe problem child. The rich could ship their kids off to military school if they were out of control.
Mary's books are so enlightening with her degree in clinical psychology and first hand experience. Listen to "Too Much and Never Enough" first. Mary does a beautiful job narrating. Don't forget, the books are free from your library or the audio books are free on their app Libby. (In case you can't support Mary by buying her books in these uncertain times.)
Mary, your eloquence really shines in today's fantastic piece. We look to you for insights about your deranged uncle that only a family member can provide.
Sadly, your warning will be lost on the intractably incurious MAGA masses.
My response to “America first!” is alway this:
Our global preeminence isn’t a given. It was EARNED over more than 200 years of calculated diplomacy, military intervention, humanitarian aid and economic reliability, though can be lost much faster.
This juxtaposition is so interesting. And now we have “a weakened system that bends constantly towards one person’s dysfunction…” How far can it bend until it snaps?
I fear we may be only days from finding out!
I do not remember ever reading this poem, though I knew about the artist -- overshadowed by his peers. Former English and art teacher, here, and I thoroughly enjoyed your discussion of the poem. What a perfect way to start my week! Your father seems more real and human to me than your uncle, his wife or any of his children.
Wisdom and insight most gracefully expressed. The lesson is clear. It’s a tragic mess of human disabilities. Mistakes are the best teachers of how to do it better next time. Better mistakes ? Yes! Because we must learn and repair and improve without end. Just a a most elegant essay! Wow. Let’s continue to follow the path of being. NOT best….just constantly seeking to be better for more of us more of the time.
In one of Samule Beckett's there is a line, "Try again. Fail again. Fail better." A good line for life.
Wow. Very well stated.
Fabulous writing! You are the brilliant one in the family. Why can we NOT🥲 learn from history
We (the ones not learning from history) are the ones who do not study it.
Only they can change that. They better hurry up🔥🔥
Who are "they"?
And why do so many Americans say that it's someone else who needs to change, while all the world knows that the only person you can change is yourself?
You're creating an impasse by default. You need some training in logic to avoid that.
Interesting way to look at it. I know and have experienced much history myself. Anyone can see how it repeats itself. We can also learn much about similarities in people. Aside from all we can learn it is fun and ever fascinating.
You didn't answer my question
In order to know where you're going, you need to know where you've been.
Because of the complacency she points out as our trap.
Fine essay. I read Browning’s poem in a course of Victorian poetry with a great teacher. I was 20 years old, now 92. Never forgot its message, of which you reminded me today. We have forgotten who we were and lean on an image that must be constantly enlivened to be true. Now we are losing what others died for: our freedom.
Thank you. As others have said I learn new things (and this time in a different way-I enjoyed your approach today) when I read your newsletters. I read somewhere lately ""Never stop learning because history never stops teaching!"
Wow Mary, you have never failed to amaze me.
The common myth of America's "exceptionalism" has blinded us to the creeping erosion of our country, no more coasting along without engaging as citizens. The mass murderer is now cocooned in our White House.
The words “American exceptionalism” seem to have been thought up relatively recently?
No, it has been espoused as Ameria’s idenity for many years Take a look back for the details. By April, 2025 many people began asking how America went down a path leading to where we are now at and “America Exceptionalism” was included with apathy. Visit my substack “Swaying trees…” and read my posts about these two mind sets. On top of these are political decisions that shifted Americans away from “The American Dream” it’s not a pretty picture, but knowledge is empowering. I follow both Heather Cox Richardson and Timothy Synder then research for more details. Knowledge is empowering, join in!
This is what I was referring to: "The term "American exceptionalism" was rarely used after the 1930s until U.S. newspapers popularized it in the 1980s to describe America's cultural and political uniqueness."
Conversations with Lincoln:
I remember looking into the mirror after supper, when the daylight had nearly vanished.
The basin was cold, the towel damp, and the light - by kerosene lamp, candle, sometimes gaslight - cast shadows that reminded me of a specter.
My hair was dark, my skin pale, but my eyes… Not blue. Not gray. But, Pumice. Stone-ish and porous, Ever so different. Etched with flecks. Was this what I was destined to become?
I saw it. Others saw it. And I knew it made people uneasy. But I didn’t mind. I wasn’t trying to be beautiful. I was trying to be kind.
Well, that was stunning. And gorgeous. Thank you for sharing. 💜💜💜
I loved today’s article. Thank you. I have surmised that your uncle may be the way he is because he was surrounded by people that have told him how great, wonderful, smart, handsome, and every other positive adjective one can think of…all of his life.
You can see it in a toddler as you try to help build their self esteem. Imagine continuing to hear that your entire life. Of course you’d believe it as your uncle does. It’s the building of a monster.
From what I read the mother of Trump could not cope with her last two children. She had a difficult husband and became mired in neurosis and illness.
Apparently young Donald had very little attention and became a severe problem child. The rich could ship their kids off to military school if they were out of control.
Just sayin. . .
So true!
I am and always was intrigued by family history and the interaction between them..
Not enough attention was devoted to Trump’s mother and what contributed to her psychological decline and deterioration..
Mary's books are so enlightening with her degree in clinical psychology and first hand experience. Listen to "Too Much and Never Enough" first. Mary does a beautiful job narrating. Don't forget, the books are free from your library or the audio books are free on their app Libby. (In case you can't support Mary by buying her books in these uncertain times.)
So much I didn't know. So much explained. Thank you Mary.
What a beautifully written piece of comparison between family and country, contrasting reality and imagination! Mary, you have inspired me! Thank you!
Mary, your eloquence really shines in today's fantastic piece. We look to you for insights about your deranged uncle that only a family member can provide.
Sadly, your warning will be lost on the intractably incurious MAGA masses.
My response to “America first!” is alway this:
Our global preeminence isn’t a given. It was EARNED over more than 200 years of calculated diplomacy, military intervention, humanitarian aid and economic reliability, though can be lost much faster.
Thank you Mary. I appreciate learning more as I remember
my studies when a youngster.
🙏👏 So true !