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E.C.'s avatar

I love the statistics chart of how we misunderstand the real numbers. While I know that the trans community is small, I was surprised at the other numbers. How interesting that Trump and republicans are twisting the truth and creating unreasonable, overblown fear. Thank you, Mary!

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Pamela Tanton's avatar

Makes me want to read Wuthering Heights again. Eighth grade was long long ago. But cruelty and fear—they’re with us still, and more damaging than ever.

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Patricia Turcotte's avatar

I never read the book but Kate Bush and Pat Benatar sing a song about it 😃

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janet's avatar

Never too late! I'm going to re-read after decades.

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Patricia Turcotte's avatar

I spend so much time following so many great minds on Substack, that I don't have much time for leisure reading 🙄

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Bruce Kopetz's avatar

Same here. So unfortunate but so true. To me, how you write is just as important as what you write about. That's scarce on the Internet, maybe because the subject matter isn't fictional.

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Emily Marbach's avatar

I re-read it a few years ago and couldn’t understand my teenage self who loved Heathcliff who was a very unpleasant man.

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Susan.L.Knox's avatar

Free m what I remember, the eigthgh grade version was purged, change 9oopppppppppppp0 uninteresting and forgettable. I didn't read any Dickens again until 50 years later.

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Jennie Edwards's avatar

I started singing one version of that song as soon as I started reading this! The song brought a smile to my face. ❤️‍🩹🤍💙

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Dennis King's avatar

Pamela, this novel is worth re-reading, Mary would say, and it offers a window as with the screeching branch, to the torment which D's fearful followers must feel. Pitifully, it may be too late to save many of them as they swirl into the inferno, but we must work to save as many of us, with a view to a future without him, as we can while there is still time.

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Dennis King's avatar

A masterful essay upon the sources of depravity, Mary.

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Pamela Tanton's avatar

She’s so good.

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Dennis King's avatar

Oh, yeah!

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Julie O's avatar

Thanks for this great article! You explain fear in a way I've never understood before. And I also like your point:

"But we are not the intended audience for Donald’s rhetoric, so our reactions to and assessments of it are irrelevant." However, his rhetoric is driving me crazy and at times I have to literally scream to vent all my anger!

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Joyce T. SMITH's avatar

Yes, and: Turn off whatever device is vomiting his garbage at you! The oligarchs of corporate media are giving him free reign. (Just as they did with President Biden. NOT!) Or turn to a station playing music to help re-ground yourself. Focus on groups that are RESISTING❣️

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kdsherpa's avatar

WOW!!! Those statistics are mind-blowing! The consistent 30% misjudgment aligns with the 30% of our nation that are MAGA's.

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Aleda's avatar

That is a brilliant catch!

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kdsherpa's avatar

Thanks!

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Catherine Nash's avatar

Now that the lies are affecting those who wanted to harm others, what will they do now that the facts are smacking them in the face and emptying their pockets? And don’t forget those promised Epstein files are still in the hands of the FBI, not released to the public as DJT ‘promised!’

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kdsherpa's avatar

"now that the facts are smacking them in the face" Those crucial facts listed by Mary in this article will likely NEVER smack the magas in the face. And those facts are far, far more important in their distorted way of thinking than the Epstein files.

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Elleee Rose's avatar

Frightened white people are bringing America to an end, not immigrants.

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kdsherpa's avatar

You are RIGHT! I never thought of it that way. Talk about IRONY.

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Lynda Phoenix's avatar

"There's nothing to fear but fear itself" I guess that's true. Though in the wee hours of the morning perception can become truly warped. I remember as a little girl I came down with measels. My mom knew that measels was not just a "childhood disease. She knew it could be dangerous, so she kept me in bed, in a darkened room for a week. While recouperating, my Aunt brought me a present. It was a recycled chocolate box that had little square, cubbie holes and in each she placed a little treasure. One of the spaces held a little snail. Well, I laugh at myself now, but, in that darkened room, that snail looked real and I was afraid to touch it. Now the logical side of my young mind told me it wasn't. Why would my aunt gift me a real live snail? I swear, I sat with that thing for the longest time (I never thought to ask my mom about it as somewhere in my subconscious mind I knew I was being stupid. Paralyzed with fear over a snail. And what would it do if it was real? Slime me? They don't bite. After what seemed like the longest time, I noticed that it hadn't moved so I ventured to pick it up (yeah, surprise, it wasn't real, it was ceramic). After that, it was one of my favorite things and I rather like snails (not eating my plants, though). It just shows that fear can act as a paralysis on the brain if we let it. I guess that's the idea of controlling with fear. There are ways to overcome this and we each need to find out what works for us. Knowing we're not alone helps tremendously. Thank you , Mary. I know that you're one of us and that helps a lot!

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catsongs's avatar

I love your story. Thank you for using it to so vividly illustrate the fear paralysis phenomenon, and for reminding me of an example in my own childhood. While visiting rural cousins when I was 5, a foxtail stabbed me and lodged in my ankle flesh. I was so afraid--of what, I don't know--that I didn't tell anyone and the wound became infected. Fortunately, it healed on its own (oh, youth) but to this day I have no clue why I was more afraid of some imagined dire consequence (I think shame was a component as well) than the reality of an infected wound. Irrational, yes. Uncommon? Apparently not. Your tale allowed me to viscerally experience a memory of my own which might help me to, at least, find a tiny window of common humanity with some people I have not been able to stomach for at least a decade.

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Lynda Phoenix's avatar

Thank you for sharing your experience. When I was a child I was very shy and hated to bring attention to myself. Our school play yard was very rough so when I fell down and skinned my knee it would really hurt. It didn't matter if I was bleeding and felt like crying, I would swallow the pain with a ... Nothing to see here attitude. Just because I couldn't stand the embarrassment of drawing attention to myself. I'm still kind of like that, although ever since menopause (which was a long time ago) I've been less shy and more outspoken. It's too bad we have to experience hot flashes to get to that point. Maybe that's our trial by fire? Love your name.

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catsongs's avatar

Sounds like we grew up around the same time--asphalt pavement? Thanks for the name mention. I'm a singer and I have feline children so...And yeah, hot flashes. Not for the weak! But it does bring out our inner fierce: https://youtu.be/lx0z9FjxP-Y?feature=shared TOWANDA!!

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RRiveter's avatar

Thanks for the chart. How true it appears. So many figures are made up, when the truth hurts, really hurts. Every other American is not transgender, is not Jewish, is not gay, is not Atheist, is not Islamic, etc etc etc. The elevated figures have been out and out bullshit for years, and Trump's moronic idiots just go with it all of the time.

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Jeffrey C Scheuerman's avatar

Donald Trump IS AN Atheist, cannot quote a single Bible Verse, does NOT attend Church, has not been confirmed, charged with corruption & theft, and convicted of physically assaulting a woman in Public who he did not know, and owes workers 100's of millions he stiffed them when they completed their jobs for him! EVIL is the Orange Man! He would be Red, but that color is claimed by the Man Down Under!

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Memory's avatar

Add was hiding in Justice John Roberts the red as we now know.

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Robot Bender's avatar

Damn, Mary. That's chilling. How can that be countered?

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linda sherer's avatar

This is the best message I have read so far! I have no idea why so many believe the lies put out by Fox, etc. The fear is very real. It's impossible to ignore when it's all around you.

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blithe's avatar

makes me think about orson welles 'war of the worlds' when he did that radio show about aliens invading earth. i think that show was on for maybe one hour, once, and it caused mass panic about =actual= aliens from literal space. so one hour of totally implausible programming caused that reaction -- now extrapolate that to literally decades of surround sound fox. decades. if america was a healthy country none of this would ever have gotten off the ground. it should have been stopped so many years ago.

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HermaniaMac's avatar

Perfect metaphor -- frighteningly perfect.

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Maureen Sbrogna's avatar

I think it’s because their only news source is Fox. Everyday, the same lies, over and over again. Sad and scary.

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Lee McVey's avatar

Brilliant! Amazing how 'amped-up' video propaganda has people so far off from reality. How much else has been distorted?

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Annie Weeks's avatar

Not to mention a character like Charlie Kirk.

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Debbie's avatar

I'm kind of 'guessing': damn near Everything!

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Patricia Lane's avatar

Donald Trump has an affinity for cruelty that makes itself known across the board. Fear of unhinged people is also huge. No one knows exactly how twisted he is , but it’s become very clear that his actions towards all others are insane .

He’s quite good to himself , however , in hoarding money .

Where has all the money gone from all of these programs he’s destroyed?

USAID for instance?

The Education Department . Think of all that’s been destroyed in this country. We are the targets.

The money isn’t doing anything good . That’s for sure .

Of course so much that’s been destroyed is funded , at least in part , by our tax money .

So it’s damn personal.

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Francis/Clare's avatar

A shocking amount has gone to prop up our genocidal overlords.

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David Hope's avatar

An extraordinary and lucid essay.

There is depth, common sense, and true sensitivity here.

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Elena Freshman Schumann's avatar

While people can commit horrible things out of fear, people also have the capacity to harm others not because they are afraid of the people they are hurting but because they enjoy hurting other people. Serial Killers like Ted Bundy have actually admitted this (after they were caught). Often this characteristic is developed in childhood because a child has witnessed people being hurt or actually have been hurt themselves. Or they have experienced animals being tortured or hurt and they start their terror first by going after animals, this is well documented. This has nothing to do with fear it has to do with our capacity to hurt others for reasons other than self defense. We have to understand that given the right exposure to this activity at a young enough age, anyone can become a sadist or even a entire country ie Germany under the Third Reich.

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lori gage's avatar

I 100% agree.

Fascinating.

Good argument for accessible, no cost mental health treatment, adequate funding for school counselors and drug/alcohol treatment centers.

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Elena Freshman Schumann's avatar

I agree we do not do enough of these things. In the long run we will ALL benefit for doing these things, people are very short sighted.

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Annie Kent's avatar

I agree with you, Elena, but only to a point. But what I've gleaned from Mary Trump's books about The Donald and her family generally, "Uncle Donald" was predisposed to exhibit sociopathy. It's interesting to contemplate the long-term effect of being denied NOTHING on a very egocentric child. In the Donald's case, the outcome has proven terrifying.

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Elena Freshman Schumann's avatar

It makes sense that a person who is predisposed to sociopathy would become even worse if it he had a father like Fred Trump. It is a combination of biology and environment which creates who you are, you cannot really separate the they are so entwined together.

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MARY O's avatar

More fodder for when they all go down. And they are going down.

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Martha's avatar

Thank you for your unflinching courage. I do not know if he is targeting you, but I am sure your candor puts you in harms way. As a psychotherapist, I find your assessments accurate and refreshing in an era when we are peddling mostly bullshit.

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